


9 ways to say i love you

by inmylife



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Mentions of Anxiety, because i cant write a produce fic without mentioning or referencing him at least once, dear ymc please let them sleep, jaehwan has a lot of self doubt, lowkey this came out as woojin pov even though i wasnt trying for that, mentioned kim jiwon | genie and various managers, no schedules line taking care of their busy members, probably not canon compliant but, reckless minhyun, so ok i guess, yes jonghyun is taking care of them all through minhyun he's actually an angel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-04-13
Packaged: 2019-04-22 04:37:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14300970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inmylife/pseuds/inmylife
Summary: woojin and guanlin wait up for the others to come home.





	9 ways to say i love you

**Author's Note:**

> im already sorry everyone

o - “we have to”

 

It feels like they get the most sleep in Wanna One. This isn’t necessarily an achievement to be proud of, because it means they have the least schedules, and everyone else gets maybe two hours average on any given day, but it’s Guanlin and Woojin’s greatest achievement within the group, at least, they think.

 

Mostly because it means they can do this. Stay up until three in the morning for the others to get back. They don’t mind. They have the whole next day to sleep between rap and dance practice, anyways. The others don’t.

 

i - “drink this”

 

Sungwoon stumbles in a little past four. It’s rare he has solo activities, but the company has him recording an OST by himself, much to Sungwoon’s pride and Jaehwan’s frustration. He’s half asleep, and his manager opens the door for him before slipping out.

 

Sungwoon’s hands are shaking. Woojin knows from experience how anxiety is always worse at night, and Sungwoon is no exception. Guanlin is already in the kitchen, boiling water for tea. Sungwoon doesn’t, or can’t, hold the mug by the handle, but wraps his hands around the cup, not flinching at all at the heat. Woojin leans his head on Sungwoon’s shoulder, and Guanlin whispers compliments in his lilting Korean, and they wait together for the panic to pass so Sungwoon can sleep.

 

ii - “let’s get you cleaned up”

 

Jinyoung is usually caked in makeup when he comes home, mostly because his schedules are either television shows or photoshoots. Woojin takes him by the hand and leads him into the cramped dorm bathroom to wash his face, because Jinyoung is too exhausted to do it himself, and a simple makeup wipe won’t do.

 

Jinyoung’s C9 manager is one of their favorites, because she lets them borrow her phone to call his company noonas when he’s upset. Tonight is one of those nights. Tear tracks are visible on Jinyoung’s face, they shine in the dark, but Woojin and Guanlin refuse to wake the other members because they know they need as much sleep as they can get. One of the Jiwons talks to Jinyoung from two minutes after he gets home until Guanlin has deposited Jinyoung into Minhyun’s bed. Minhyun won’t mind, he never does.

 

iii - “you’re never without them, not really”

 

One of the things about Minhyun is that he’s incredibly clever, and reckless, and loyal, and all of these things especially more when it comes to Nu’est. He sneaks out some nights, and when he comes home he’s even more tired because he refuses to fall asleep while he’s there for fear of wasting precious time. Only the rap line and Jisung really know, but all the members have seen how sometimes some bread will appear next to their pillow when they wake up in the morning or how someone might find a stress ball or fidget cube that doesn’t actually belong to anyone. Tonight, it’s little notes from Sungwoon’s members - how Minhyun had found and cornered Hojung, Woojin doesn’t know and doesn’t want to know - that someone will slip into his pocket tomorrow.

 

This helps keep Minhyun sane, but he’s an unintelligible sobbing mess when he comes home. He mumbles about how he wants to go back and sleep with his members, he’s so tired, that wasn’t enough time, but Woojin pulls Minhyun up on his feet and practically carries him into his bedroom. Guanlin slips in beside him. Minhyun sleeps better with a dongsaeng to hold.

 

(After six years of hardship, none of the Nu’est members are really used to sleeping alone.)

 

iv - “eat something”

 

It’s the worst to see Jisung truly upset. When Guanlin and Woojin had seen him cry on the show, it had been out of shock and happiness - when he placed third, and then when he debuted. They know he must have been upset when his company trainees were eliminated, and when he got all those hate comments, but they’re never seen it, which is why it’s so jarring for the two of them to see their strong, caring, funny leader crying tears of frustration on the couch two hours before they’re due to wake up again.

 

Woojin whispers that he’s doing so great as leader - half the time he comes home late it’s from arguing with management with Minhyun and Sungwoon on their behalf - and lets Jisung rest his head on his shoulder. Guanlin makes Jisung eat. Their leader has a nasty habit of giving his share to the younger members, and he’s lost so much weight since signing the contract with YMC, arguably even more so than Daniel or Jihoon. They worry. Guanlin watches him like a hawk to make sure he doesn’t leave anything for Daniel to have, because he can’t take care of them when he isn’t taking care of himself.

 

v - “in, out”

 

Seongwoo has trouble breathing, sometimes, and when he slams open the door just as the sun rises Guanlin immediately goes to him. He wraps his arms around the older boy and pulls him into a hug and Woojin guides them both to the bedroom as Seongwoo buries his face in Guanlin’s shoulder. They hold Seongwoo’s hands, one rapper on each side, and Woojin talks him through slowing down his breathing. Guanlin is quiet. Sometimes it helps just to know someone’s in your corner.

 

In the mornings, after nights like this, Woojin goes to Minhyun’s room and steals a stress ball from the jar on Minhyun’s dresser (they all know they come from him) (Seongwoo keeps losing his, no matter how many times Woojin does this, and Jonghyun keeps giving Minhyun more) to pass into Seongwoo’s hands when he comes home again, and Guanlin writes notes on slips of notebook paper he should really be using for school or writing lyrics that say encouraging things like “remember to breathe” and “you’re going to be okay” and “I love you, hyung” and leaves them behind Seongwoo’s toiletries in the bathroom cabinet where he might find them later.

 

Seongwoo isn’t great with emotions, but he tells those two that he loves them a little more than he does to the others, and Woojin and Guanlin hear the “thank you” loud and clear.

 

vi - “you are good enough”

 

Self-doubt eats at Jaehwan like a shark, and he’s crying more often than not when he comes home. It’s almost five, and Woojin wants to grab the CJ manager and shake him (or maybe throw him off a building) because it seems like the man couldn’t care less that Jaehwan is upset. Woojin and Guanlin couldn’t care more.

 

Guanlin is good at telling stories and dumb jokes, he made himself good at it, because he’s determined to make Jaehwan smile just a little bit. Whether it’s the plot of his latest drama or something stupid Daehwi or Seonho or Soyeon did, Guanlin has learned from bingeing variety shows and other peoples’ V Lives how to tell it, because he loves his hyungs and they’re worth the effort. Even though his tutor gets angry at him for learning four different slang words for potato when he should have been learning the subjunctive case. Guanlin doesn’t care.

 

Woojin knows, he gets it, so he leaves his own room for the night and lies on Jaehwan’s floor. Jaehwan is the loudest member, sure, but Woojin is the quietest, mostly, so when it’s just the two of them it’s quiet. Jaehwan, like Seongwoo, is a bit of a character, and sometimes he needs a moment just to be himself. Woojin lets him.

 

vii - “i have you”

 

Daehwi is scared. Daehwi is tired. Daehwi feels like he’s not good enough. Daehwi walks through the door alone and slumps into Woojin’s waiting arms. Woojin pulls him into his lap and rocks him gently until the younger boy’s sobs calm into frail whimpers and eventually go quiet as he falls asleep.

 

He misses his mom at night, because it’s day in the States, and he can’t stop thinking about his mother and what she’s doing right now and if she misses him and if he’s a bad son for leaving her. Guanlin talks to him in English until Daehwi is too tired to even listen. It helps.

 

viii - “rest”

 

Jihoon pulls a lot of late nights. Some days he doesn’t sleep for days on end. When they do let him come home, it’s usually during the day, and he’s so exhausted he doesn’t even make it to his bed. Woojin and Guanlin let him fall asleep in their arms and walk him to the couch.

 

It’s hard on Daniel, too, but Jihoon is younger, barely an adult. Woojin can see it, the anxiety developing in him, in the way he freezes up when he says something wrong even in the safety of the dorms, in the way he gasps awake in their bedroom from a nightmare. And he gets sick, because he’s too tired and underfed, so then he goes to schedules with a fever and the cycle gets even worse.

 

Woojin and Guanlin let him sleep on the couch for a little bit as they make a sandwich and pour something sugary into a glass. Guanlin digs through his cabinet for makeup wipes and cleans Jihoon off. Then he runs a comb briefly through his hair and takes off his shoes, because he’s too tired even for that. They pull him upright again and drag him to his bed and Woojin climbs in there with him because Jihoon needs to know Woojin will always take care of him.

 

ix - “you’ve worked hard”

 

Daniel’s home. Woojin wraps his wrist without a word because Daniel refuses to admit to anyone that it’s hurting and lord knows the company doesn’t care. Guanlin heats up the tteokbokki he and Woojin and some others had eaten for dinner almost ten hours ago because he knows Daniel hasn’t eaten.

 

“I’m so tired of it.” He just needs someone to vent to, he’s too tired to care who or whether or not they answer back. “I’m so sick of not sleeping and not eating and seeing everyone hurting and tired at practice, because this might be my dream, but I’m killing myself for it.”

 

“So let’s go to sleep, hyung,” Guanlin whispers back.

 

“I don’t know if I want to do this anymore.”

 

They don’t know how to answer that. Instead, they each wind an arm around him and walk him to his bedroom so he can sleep.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> so apparently woojin has around the same number of schedules as guanlin (even though nobody yells at ymc for him) 
> 
> they need to get some rest i'm really worried abt the boys ok i really hope they're alright, this experience is almost definitely doing a number on their minds and bodies and i had a lot of feelings so i just had to write it out okay !!!
> 
> i wrote this with their recent room changes in mind but also all within one apartment so just... roll with it
> 
> i'm thinking of writing a little more with woojin and daehwi's part so idk if you have any strong feelings abt that let me know


End file.
